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Astronomers Detect Something Waving Back, Agree To Pretend They Did Not
May 22, 2026 / Dr. Voltage
Satire / entertainment. Read responsibly. Panic recreationally.
Filed by the Night Desk. The signal was described as friendly, rhythmic, and bad for morale.
Witnesses were advised to remain calm, keep receipts, and avoid making eye contact with any object that had recently learned confidence.
This is satire and entertainment. The newsroom recommends practical shoes and emotional flexibility.
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