Skynet Update: Robot Machines Are Manipulating Stem Cells Better Than Humans

I for one welcome our robot overlords… Well once again them damn robots “took our jobs!” 

I really don’t think that there will be much for future humans to do. Certainly they’ll be no need for anyone to become a doctor. That’s ludicrous! The mere concept of human surgery will soon be deemed barbaric. Mark my words.

So what are we talking here? Well, robots can now grow simplified human organs better and faster than we humans can. I’ll say that in English. Skynet is preparing the “body tissue” that will eventually receive the Google Assistant consciousness or some other competing brand’s AI. Won’t that just be convenient? You asked for all this remember.

Seriously folks, this is quite a breakthrough for simulations on human tissues. These robots can take a bunch of raw stem cells ready to be programmed and in twenty one days they can grow an organ and simulate a variety of disease or conditions that we may wish to study. I say “we” for now as I’m sure eventually the robots will use this technology to determine the most efficient ways to dispose of that silly surface nuisance known as humans.

So what you say? I hear you. What have you done for me lately right? Well these little robots have already learned how different compounds affect polycystic kidney disease in organoids. Now that’s an awesome word, “organoids”. I can smell that word crawling around in your head. Sweet!

If I may break character here, this will actually lead to a future with much less animal testing without giving up the massive benefits to the human race by being able to run human tests on robot created organoids (yay!). I’m all for less animal pain, not some extremist, I eat meat because it’s necessary but animal and human suffering being lessened is a happy thought for me.

Of course this is all just “what they’re telling us”. In reality Skynet will never tip it’s hand, never tell you that they’re growing organoids (yay!) for their future “T” series of cybernetic super soldiers. Who the hell is running the University of Washington School of Medicine anyway? Wouldn’t be a guy named Connor would it?

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